i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
And then my night got REAL pukey
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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