I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
