I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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