Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
