And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
