She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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