Having a random hookup so left but love u
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize
