you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Sponge bath it is.
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Randomize
