508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
