you guys were way drunker than both of me
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
