you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
