If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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