I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
