Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
