Don't you send me to vm
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Randomize