Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Randomize
