No stitches, just platelets and will power
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
