sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize