I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
