She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
