I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
