Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize