OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
