she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
