I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
