just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I fill condoms, not promises.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I need to calm my uterus...
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
