Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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