He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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