nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
