I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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