GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
And the cops told us we were all naked.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Randomize
