I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize