the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
