it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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