shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
