Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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