im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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