I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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