Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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