physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Damn victory sex feels great
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
