What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
