If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
