Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
