...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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