Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
