I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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