do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
