I heard we made out
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize