His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
