Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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