Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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